Lost Thoughts..

They don’t know the painful nights and days I am experiencing…Tortured by my own thoughts daily…I feel I am in such misery…I don’t want to feel this pain anymore…I let myself go…I feel in love with someone I should have never feel for…I knew better, but I still chose to love him…Till this day I question why it is he walked into my life, and that answer I may never get…Is it for me to know? Will I ever love like this again? Or will I build a wall? He loved me as much as he could and that I will never doubt…My memories with him will always be treasured, they will have to be hidden somewhere deep in my heart in order for me to go on for now…I look forward to the day, years from now where I can pull them out and smile at all our great times together…I am not sure what I am writing, I just felt at this moment that I needed to release all of these feelings, thoughts, emotions…