Down side

Current mood-down, sad, confused
song for today-H.A.T.E.U.

So it really has been so long since I have blogged. I blame it on my job for blocking the site...I actually miss bloggin, it was a way for me to freely express myself...So a lot has happened since my last blog...I just got back from vacation about a week ago...I went home and had sooo much fun, I did have a little bit of down time so I had my moments but for the most part I tried to stay happy and positive...My family is truly amazing so are my great special friends which I do consider family...
So my 2 year relationship has come to an end, hence me feeling down. I know it was a forbidden dill and I knew it wouldnt last forever, but I didnt want it to end the way it did...There has only been one other time when I was truly heart broken and I think this may be worse...the pain is so intense...I miss him and EVERYTHING reminds me of him, he was such an amazing man but I guess he knew it was time to end...I wanted to forever be his friend but I cant at this point I am too hurt and when I do see him I just want him to hold me to love me to want me...So I have to let go and walk away forever...I will always remember him and he will always hold a special place in my heart...Just writing about this breaks me...
I will get through it I will use this time to focus on me and do what i got to do, I will get better...